K. Tempest Bradford

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I am crap at writing bios

June 16, 2009 by Tempest

But more and more lately I need a bio, either short or long, to give to someone. The one on my bio page is boring and stilted. This will not do. Help me out here — point to some awesome author bios that you really like. Or, rewrite my bio to make it more exciting! Or make up a fictional bio for yourself and post it in the comments.

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Filed Under: Writing Life Tagged With: bios

Comments

divider with ancient egyptian scarab I'm writing an AfroRetroFuturist novel set in a matriarchal ancient Egypt where queer women of color rule the sand and sky. Want to know more? Read about it here. Want to help make it happen? Support my work!

Comments

  1. veejane says

    June 16, 2009 at 7:17 pm

    K. Tempest Bradford’s first name is actually Potassium, the result of her parents’ lifelong study of the nutritional value of bananas. She spent her childhood in South America climbing banana trees, and to this day lives in New York in a building with no elevator.

    Although she is a member of the Black Beans writing group, she actually prefers pinto beans. Or maybe cannellini. Her inability to choose just one kind explains her membership in the Interstitial Arts Foundation, and her preference for three-bean salad. She has never eaten an insect on purpose, but belongs to Electrice Velocipede anyway.

    And so forth!

    (Somebody’s dinner is not cooking fast enough.)

  2. Alex Jennings says

    June 16, 2009 at 7:30 pm

    Yeah, I’m not very good at it either. I always have to suppress the tendency to make shit up entirely. It’s unfair that people think just because I’ve never been to prison or space, I shouldn’t say I have. You’ve seen the one on my myspace? The Mack Bolan bio? I wish I could just use that for everything….

  3. Alex Jennings says

    June 16, 2009 at 7:31 pm

    That’s a really good one. I wish you could do one for me.

  4. Aimee says

    June 16, 2009 at 7:34 pm

    K. Tempest Bradford is awesome.

    (There, all done!)

  5. Vylar Kaftan says

    June 16, 2009 at 10:02 pm

    I think the one on my site is a pretty decent example of a bio for people like us who don’t have Hugos. :) It’s hard to write them when you don’t have a ton to say, so just have fun with it.

  6. Nina says

    June 16, 2009 at 11:43 pm

    Psh, I CAN’T EVEN WRITE MY OWN BIO. **_**

    K. Tempest Bradford once strangled a leopard just to see if it would turn blue. She invented a wildly popular strain of candy and then disappeared out of thin air for eight years, only to return as the queen of a small republic (oxymoronish as this seems). She currently lives in New York, and has been known to eat small children who don’t behave.

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